Day go by....

And still I think of you.
Almost 3 weeks and she still comes to me.  *smile*

The day after....

Last night after Tee passed, we all went back to the house to chill a little. The mood was oddly light.  I don't know if it was bc we had already come to terms with what was enevitable, or if we were jaded to the reality of the matter....

This morning I feel I personally was jaded last night. Not realizing that IT was over. Her life. Never shall she see her grand children. Shell never meet her sons wives. She won't be there for lots of thing....I guess I'm in the its not fair stage of greiving...it not fucking fair. There so sooo many terrible, horrible, EVIL ppl out there. People who don't love their family. People who only wish EVIL thing on others. Ppl who would not be mourned, or missed..ppl whose absence whould not alter the path of the people around them....fuckin EvIL ppl. This is the last place they will ever live rent free! EVIL is out of our minds, because Tee now resides in our hearts, as we love her, she loves us more.

The chill

It occured, on april 18th around 11:30p.....

My sister was a vacuum cleaner wen it came to cocaine....
The four line story....
Decided to go shopping at pathmark where she worked
And yeah...great stories!!

Early morn....

640 am I get a call from Carrol, hysterical! She actually got sleep last night, but woke up to davi sleeping, and a quiet hose.....so I assume her thought took over cus she was crying uncontrollably.
710am I get to carrol, she so upset. she's on the phone a long time friend, telling her the same thing everyone tells her lately, don't let Angela occupy space in ur mind. She has enough to worry about without all this unimportant crap and energy that Angela brings..
830 at the hospice everyone is sleeping....She made a comment to me but no one understood wat she says not even me......watever. she really doesn't want to be a bitch to me. I have be neutral over all.
Let see how it goes....

Round one.

I'm pretty sure T was suprised her sisters made it this long wo going at each other......story from Carrol is that Ang was trying to pour water down Ts thoat...and she went to stop her and there was an altercation involving carrol grabing angs hair in order to break her fall.....Ang says she was not trying to give her water at the time that carrol pulled her hair.....idk who to believe.. I know carrol and how she reacts and ang may have instigated the sitch but damn! I'm pissed now..........
This is their sister! Blood! This bs ego crap should not be happening right now!! She is not doing well and they shoulf just suck it the fuck up!!I really can not justify eithers behavior........

I said it.....

Kinda underminded by a fight.....but I got to speak to T alone. It was nice altho I know she is fading, I can still feel her energy, today more than any other....